What If

Many people have asked me over the last few months, why I’ve chosen to take 6 months off work, and what am i going to do with this time, and i’ve not been able to give them a satisfactory answer, primarily because they don’t understand my passions or what drives me, nor should i expect them too, and also because they were asking the wrong question “I am not taking 6 months off work” I am giving myself 6 months to find and discover what I actually want to do with the rest of adult life, “having 6 months away from work is just one of many bi-products of this choice”

Previously I have been trying and failing to justify my choice with people who can only relate my choices in relation to there own desires and understanding, often suggesting the same solution “why not just change jobs if you feeling unfulfilled, their is no need to eat through your savings.” There’s my problem right there, everyone sees an 8-5 job as an essential part of life and never ‘seriously considers any alternatives (they always have a good excuse though, but not me anymore).

I refuse to accept I am destined to continue down the 40hr week path until i eventually retire sometime in my 60’s, i’ve always known i’m smarter then most people, so why do i keep listening to the advice of these people i’m supposedly smarter than and living my life the way they taught me to growing up. I know how this sounds, but shouldn’t i be seeking out those of equal or even greater intelligence to me, those who have already done or are already doing what i need to do? “yes i should be”. Now an i find and spend sufficant time with these individuals while maintaining my current lifestyle, perhaps, but it would be 10 times more difficult and take many times longer to gather what i need.

Everyone wishes and dreams it’s possible,many buy lottery tickets hoping to achieve it, several think about ways they could achieve it, but few actually start taking steps to ‘exit the rat race’, and fewer still carry on after there 1st or 2nd failures in doing so. I agree it isn’t easy, but i’ve now realised I will always regret “having never attempted to change the direction of my life” given the number of years i’ve harboured this continued belief that i can do it if im just prepared to put in the required time and effort.  So now, while i’m still single and before i obtain greater reponsibilites then just myself, i must prove to myself one way or the other, which direction my life should actually be heading.

Knowing full well, that even should i fail, I will feel much better for having tried, and will still benefit immensly from my life learnings over this time, far in excess of the financial loss I will be incurring over this same period. The album below is perhaps the final reason I finally decided, to pursue this dream of mine, I challenge anyone to listen to the entire album and not be inspired to to find your true motivation in life.

Last Year was a year of firsts for me,I achieved all the goals and targets i set out for myself, however despite achieving these i did not get the end results i expected. I realise now that the problem wasn’t my goals, but my expectations on what achieving these ‘firsts’ would result in.

I’ve always felt, I haven’t been living my life upto its full potential, and recently i discovered why. I’ve been living my life up till now, how everyone expected me too, not how I actually want. I fell into the career path i’m presently on, after 2 seperate 8 months off unemployment where i was unable to find work in my preferred industry of Information Technology.

I have done a fair amount of world travel over the past two years, but all that has done is re-confirm to me, that i’m not heading were i need to go. ”

“if your afraid to shake the tree of life, your life will bear very little fruit” V N Taylor (Jan 31,2016)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *